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A SUMMER TO REMEMBER [01 Sep 2011|04:15am]
[ mood | thankful ]

Wow, last time I wrote I said that I wanted to make this the most memorable summer ever.

Boy, has it been.

Summer

In the last two months, I have been touring the country promoting Electric and have had the time of my life. It all started off with a trip to Pennsylvania to play Croc Rock and open up for Aaron Carter & Greg Raposo. I can't believe that I was offered an opportunity to do this show and was beyond honored to get to share the stage with people that I grew up watching and listening to. Both guys were awesome - I had actually seen Greg in concert twice before. Once at Connor Prarie and once in Chicago...and stood in his meet and greet line to meet him, so it was pretty crazy that all this time later, we were doing a show together. Aaron I had grown up knowing from the days when Tabitha was in love with Nick, so it was even crazier that he was on the bill too.

A bunch of my East Coast friends were at the show - Joyce, Janine, Becca, Cara, and my friend Isaiah rode up with me, so it was great to have familiar faces in the audience as well as a lot of East Coast fans that have been to my stuff before. It was one of those moments where you step back and go "wow, this is really happening!"

After the show, Greg congratulated me, and shortly after that, Aaron and I were introduced upstairs. He told me that he loved my sound and that I had a great set. I told him thanks and then realized - he watched my set? He told me that since he had finished the meet and greet right before I went on, he stayed down and watched my set from the back (since I kicked off the show) and really liked it. Coolest moment ever. I know it sounds dorky, but coming from an artist who I had never worked with or met before - and this being the first time I did an opening set with my new material, it meant a TON to have him say that. Definitely felt validating and for the first time I was like "this is what I've been working for!"

Needless to say, Greg and Aaron killed it and I learned so much watching their sets. Definitely was a night to remember.

After the show, I went back to the hotel and took off back home the next morning. After being home a couple days, I got an e-mail and found out that I would be going on a 5 week nationwide mall tour and headlining my own shows in each city! DREAM COME TRUE!!! It was called the "Shop Til You Rock Tour" and was sponsored by GGP Malls, Pepsi, and Gamestop. I would be doing two half an hour sets at GGP malls across the country. I grew up going to Simon D-Tour mall shows when I was a kid, so the fact that I would be getting to headling my own version of the shows I went to growing up...unreal. I literally cried after I signed my contract I was so happy.

Tour was amazing from start to finish - from the second I stepped on stage in Baton Rouge at the Mall of Louisiana til I sang my last song in Tallahassee, and I came home knowing in my heart that I lived my dream. I had accomplished what I had been working for and dreaming about my whole life.

Definitely a summer to remember...not just that, but one I'll never forget.

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[27 Mar 2011|09:58am]
Went to bed around 10:30 last night and it was awesome. I can't tell you the last time that I had a good night's sleep. Although my body is tired because it's spring break week and I've been essentially living at work this week, my mind feels clear, so that's an awesome feeling. It's amazing what a good night's sleep can do.

It's time for some spring cleaning though - making my life a little more simple and getting things together. I finally feel like things are coming together and I'm making some money to get things paid off and caught up. It's a good feeling, really.

I've been in the studio with Chris Swinney recording an acoustic version of my album and I'm excited to get it finished up. I've been writing some new material too, and I'm hoping to get in the studio with Jadion again this summer again and crank out some new tracks! I finally feel like I know what I'm doing and I'm not so intimidated this time around with the whole process. I'm so proud of Electric and I can't wait to start working on a new album! I feel very lucky in the fact that I got to say what I wanted to say. I got to work with the producer that I wanted to work with, record songs that I wrote, and got to make the record that I wanted to make. Even though it was a long process getting things all together, I'm excited to see what round 2 brings and to see how I've grown as a songwriter and performer.

The last few months I've been doing choreography at Delta for a musical called "Once on this Island" and it went awesome. I'm insanely proud of the kids and was psyched that thing went so well. I wasn't sure that I'd feel at home at Delta like I did at Northside, but everyone has really taken me in and made me feel so comfortable. I'm excited to get back to it!

I'm ready for a vacation though - a quick getaway. I think I'm going to Chicago again this year in June to hang out with Nate, so that'll be awesome, but other than that, I've got nothing planned. I'm so ready though.

Ready to make this the most memorable summer ever.
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[09 Jan 2011|11:47am]
[ mood | sick ]

2011. That's the year.

I'm feeling pretty miserable today...run down and trying not to get sick, but I'm in a good mood anyway.

I said that 2011 was going to be the year of positive change, and I wanna stick to that. All the things bringing me down, I want to leave behind me and move forward.

I'm trying to not live a blur this year. I wanna spend time accomplishing my goals and staying focused on bettering myself and creating positive opportunities. Making time for what's important, and making THAT my year.

It's almost as if last year, I eliminated all fun from my life subconsciously. That can't happen this year.

I hope and want to have a busy year, full of awesomeness and fun, and I'm looking forward to a summer of being on the road, traveling, and performing.

Here's to 2011. That's the year.

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CANDLES & PIANO [09 Dec 2010|12:16am]
[ mood | optimistic ]

Recently discovered how much I love Gavin DeGraw's "Chariot (Stripped)" album.

I'm gonna love you more than anyone...I'm gonna hold you closer than before...
...Look in my eyes, what do you see? Not just the color, look inside of me.


Beautiful. I usually don't have nights like this, but I just wanna light a few candles, listen to the piano, and sit in the dark.

I like the fact that I've been writing in this more again. I feel like it's good to keep track of things and actually have something to look back on, and to get everything out in the moment.

I think my whole attitude has changed lately - maybe not my attitude - but my focus, and I'm trying to simplify everything, be as productive as possible, and enjoy each moment for what it is. Not only that, but I'm also trying to make more moments to enjoy

I can't keep letting life pass by without those I love knowing how important they are to me, and how much I love them. I can't keep letting life pass by without living it, without making my memories, and embracing each moment.

So light your candles, breathe in, turn off your lights, relax, turn on your music, and listen. It'll change things.

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BLUR [17 Nov 2010|03:49am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

So, I'm sitting here at 4 in the morning and I figured it was a good time to write.

I'm a little under the weather right now, which is a bummer. Everyone in the house is sick right now, so it's been no fun. I keep trying to fight it off, but I'm not doing a great job of that. I fell asleep for three hours earlier too, so I'm wide awake.

I've been going through papers on my floor - old notes from middle school, school schedules, and song lyrics that I wrote when I was younger. It's been weird looking back at this stuff, and realizing that it's just time to throw it away. Some of it, I saved, sure, but I made some serious progress at de-cluttering my room, and my life. It's a weird feeling though.

I think I make things a lot harder on myself than they need to be. I'm trying to learn as much as I can, but I feel like I keep making mistake after mistake. I guess it's not a mistake if you learn from it, but I can't help but feel like the last year of my life has been a blur. Every day has become just another day to get through, and I haven't really done anything memorable. I'm struggling financially (like you wouldn't believe), and I just feel like my life is living me, instead of me living my life. It's wearing me down, and I know it's time for a change.

I'm yearning for so much more - great friends that I get to see and spend time with, a career that I'll enjoy and that'll make me happy, and enough money to be able to live stress free and not paycheck to paycheck, and honestly, my own place. It sounds so simple...maybe it is. Maybe I'm just making it harder on myself than it needs to be.

I'm just trying to keep it simple, have fun, and do something memorable. I'm tired of living a blur.

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THE LOVER AFTER ME [03 Oct 2010|10:48pm]
Sunday morning. I've already been up and working for three hours, and its only 10:30 in the morning. I guess that's how it goes, though.

I've been listening to Savage Garden all weekend, and I can't get enough. I've always loved them, but really paid attention to a couple songs I usually skipped, and realized how amazing they are.

It's the simple things, y'know?

I'm sitting in an empty building, drinking cucumber water (thanks iCarly....haha), and realizing what my life has become. I think I need to stop making myself miserable in order to accomplish some crazy long term goal, and remember that you also need to live in and for the moment.

I guess today has just kind of been the first day in a while where life has been partly calm and peaceful. I've had time to think and reflect at a time of day other than midnight or after, when my mind is racing at a million miles an hour, and I'm so tired, I can't think straight.

It makes you wonder, though, y'know? What is life all about? I say I'm happy, but I'm honestly not fulfilled. I feel like I'm constantly fighting to stay afloat. I was telling someone that the other day and it got me thinking - what WILL make me feel fulfilled? What am I chasing? A career? Love? A dream? Reality? What?

I feel like I look at where I am not - at 24 - and I never thought this is where I'd be. At the same time though, I can't help but look back and be amazed with all I've been able to do. I kind of feel like I lived life out of order, because I got to live so many of my dreams so young and so quickly. Now, there's a struggle to find fulfillment in normality and everyday life.

I'm just ready to get there.
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TWO YEARS LATER [11 Jun 2010|12:39am]
[ mood | confused ]

Two years later, I'm coming back to write in this thing.

The last two years of my life have been a whirlwind. I've gone on tour as an artist, filmed my first independent movie, did my first national commercial, went to L.A. to start my music career, released my first "single", and now I'm recording an album.

It's been a complete rollercoaster ride so to speak. Friends and situations have come and gone...re-connecting with some old friends, moving on from others, and making new ones.

All in all, I'm pretty happy, I guess. Not totally fulfilled, but happy enough.

It's actually sort of a rough night that I come back to writing this. I went to Chicago on Monday and had a pretty lifechanging experience. Just had dinner with a friend at RockIt Bar and walked around Navy Pier at night, but the conversation and experience was lifechanging. I love it.

With that though, it's provided me with an obstacle to get over - and that's figuring out what I'm chasing. What is going to fulfill me? I think I know the answer, but I think that it's near impossible for the situation in my head to play out.

Never say never, I guess, but man, I'm a little overwhelmed to say the least.

It's amazing to look back on this, but I have to say, I am looking forward to the future. I can't keep re-living old memories, I have to make new ones...and I'm really looking forward to that.

I love you.

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LA [11 Dec 2008|02:26am]
LA changes people.

I hate it.
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CHRISTMAS IS COMING [30 Nov 2008|11:52am]
I was just sitting here thinking about how Heather and I used to updated these things together all the time. Hahaha...I miss that kid. It just made me laugh because its been a while since I wrote last.

Christmas is coming!!!! There's snow on the ground already, all the radio stations are blasting Christmas music, and I'm loving it! Last year didn't seem like Christmas at all, and I didn't really have a Thanksgiving this year because I was in Illinois to tape a parade, so I guess I'm just ready for Christmas. I've already got two presents wrapped and I'm making my list for Christmas cards so I'm amped. Angie and I drove around last night scouting out locations for our Christmas light viewings, so its just feeling like Christmas. Its awesome!!! I also was the Grand Marshall of the Santa Claus Parade in Peoria, Illinois, which is the longest running Christmas parade in the country, so that was awesome too! I think everybody's just ready for Christmas!

Life has been busy lately. Lots of stuff going on, but its been good! I just hope things keep going well! I think I'm going back to LA this weekend, so that should be fun.

I guess that's about it, really. Just ready for the holidays! Hope everybody's doin well!
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BREAK THE MOLD [03 Nov 2008|08:08pm]
Life has been a challenge lately to say the least.

I'm so ready for change...in every aspect of my life its driving me nuts. I have become so complacent in the situation I'm in, it's horrible.

Living at home with my great family, working the same place I've worked all through high school, but never seeing anyone other than those people...my family and co-workers. Its driving me nuts and I've gotta get out. Its just time, really.

I've already done so much more with my life than I ever thought I'd get to do. I've lived so much, so fast, so young, and now I'm 22 sitting here writing and trying to figure out what's next for me. For a while, I thought maybe going back to school would fix things, but over time, I've just come to realize my heart isn't in it. God has a bigger plan for me, and I'm trying to figure out what that plan is and live it. Unfortunately, I'm getting impatient.

I'm ready for an adventure again...some excitement. Something dare I say - different!

I've spent the last month ready. I'm only about $900 from being able to be completely paid off with the money I owe on my credit card.

My mom keeps saying that I should go to LA, and as much as I hate the idea of living out there, I'm considering it. Why? Maybe because I'm trying to find happiness? Unfortunately, the people in this city that I deal with on a daily basis absolutely suck and I'd really like to be around people my age that have similar goals and passions. Is that so much to ask?

I miss living on a bus. I miss my friends. I miss what for two years was an amazing normality. Maybe I need to pack up my car, and drive across the country to find myself.

Life is too short and I don't wanna miss out on anything - my family's life or MINE. It's not fair to either of us, really. I need an escape from every day life.

Do I regret not going to school right away and going down the road less traveled to pursue my dreams? Absolutely not. What if I've already gotten to live my dream though? Then what? This can't be it. There's gotta be more...I know there is. I have faith. I just need someone or something to actually come through for once.

It's been a long time since I've felt like things were going how I wanted. Maybe I'm too picky but I don't feel like you should have to settle. Everyone is always telling me "that's life"....but is it? Why should we just accept things? Why not challenge them and shake things up? Isn't that what life is about...jumping...taking chances...breaking the mold? That's always what I believed. That's still what I believe.

I just need someone else to believe that with me. I'm not sure how much sense I'm making really, but it feels good to write it out.

I guess we'll see what happens.

CHRIS
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SAD :( [29 May 2008|01:50am]
[ mood | lonely ]

I miss my friends.

I see some of my newer friends next weekend, but I miss my old ones.

Not that I'm not grateful or excited, but it's really getting to me.

I miss everybody..................

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WHAT IN THE WORLD AM I HOLDING ON TO? [07 May 2008|11:33pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

I've been pretty depressed lately, and every new day that I live, I am more and more confused on what God's plan for me is.

All my life, all I wanted was to be a performer.  To be onstage performing for millions of people, and people to know and appreciate my hard work - MY blood, sweat, and tears, so to speak.

Things have been going really well with my career lately, in my opinion.  This year alone, I've been blessed with opportunities to open for/perform with SO many amazing people...some of which I was a fan of growing up or have become a fan of within recent years.  These are people I not only admire, but respect, and am inspired by, and just to have the opportunity to share the stage - one of the most intimate things in the world - with them is one of the coolest things in the world for me, let alone the fact that I've been able to become friends with some of these people and get to know them as people - not just as performers.  What's great about it all is that the people that I'm talking about are geniunely amazing people - not morons like a lot of people in this business, and I'm so lucky to have been able to have those experiences.  I got a phone call the other night from a friend of mine and I was told that I was in Popstar Magazine this month.  That was a dream of mine as a kid that I was able to fulfill.  As stupid as it sounds, it was another goal reached.  There are so many more amazing opportunities in the works for the rest of the year for me...I'm going on the road next month with a band that I've gotten to become friends with VERY recently, and we're all gonna be in an RV together, so it should be a lot of fun.  I just got back from doing my first red carpet event in Los Angeles, and I am officially approved and on file with the #1 background casting agency in Hollywood for background acting.  So many amazing things happening, right?  The weird thing about it all though is...I don't feel happy.  Those people that I've become friends with and shared so many amazing memories with - I never see.  Those people that I call my best friends - and who once called me theirs (I hope they still do) some of which are on the other side of the country, and others are not only across the country, but across the world.  It's SO hard to maintain a friendship with people that you never see, and when you do see, they're working.  I think back on some of the times we had and it really sucks to know that I'm not a part of their lives right now and that they're not a part of mine to see me starting to accomplish some of the goals that we had talked about from the very beginning of our friendship.  I couldn't be any happier for them...they truly deserve everything in the world.  I won't lie though - it's hard.  So many people came into my life so quickly and became a part of my everyday life, and now we're all split up across the country pursuing different paths, and I hate the fact that we're not all a part of each others lives anymore.  None of us can share our successes with each other...and what's the point in having success if there's no one to share it with?  I guess I just feel like this is is what I've been working towards and waiting for my entire life and now that I'm actually getting to live out some of my dreams, I kinda hoped that some of the people that mattered most to me would be able to be there to celebrate with me.  Maybe everyone's just too busy...maybe everyone's following different paths, or maybe everyone's simply grown apart, but I'll tell you what...I'll never forget those memories and I pray to God every night that we can make more.

One of my best friends from high school called me up tonight and left a voicemail asking for my address so that he could send me a wedding invitation because he is getting married.  We haven't hung out since we graduated high school.  Did I mention this kid was one of my best friends for 4 years?  And yes, we haven't hung out since we graduated, and suddenly, after 4 years of not hanging out and talking MAYBE every 9 months, we're suddenly supposed to be best friends again and I'm supposed to come to his wedding, buy a gift, and pretend like we never lost touch?  I dunno.  Once a friend, always a friend, but c'mon...why the effort now?  Not that I didn't appreciate the invite or the phone call, because that could have slipped through the cracks too, but it's just annoying.  And it's not just that situation...it's so many relationships in my life like that and I guess that was just really bad timing, because it really got to me.  Who knows?

Is it toomuch to ask to have someone to throw around a light up football with?  Or just drive around aimless doing nothing sitting next to? 

Seriously...that's all I want.

Summer 2008...I'm counting on you to be one of the most amazing summers of my life.  Don't let me down.  I need you to come through for me....

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[03 Mar 2008|01:44am]
[ mood | lonely ]

Be quiet angel
Don’t make a sound
Save it for a rainy day
Oh can’t you see me
I’m such a mess
Trying hard to find my way

 

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[11 Feb 2008|02:44am]
[ mood | excited ]

Best weekend I've had in a LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG time!

Thanks to Jess, Amy, Kevin, Misty, Shannon, Kyle, Tab, Angie, Joey, Jared, Linds, Andy, Jason (haha), and everyone else who made me smile this weekend.

And of course a big shoutout to Kelly Clarkson and Reba McIntyre for putting on one of the best concerts I've ever seen.  If you don't believe me, here's the review...


And that is all.  I'm off to bed, then up to pack for Florida!!!!!!!!  :)

Night!!!!!
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[28 Jan 2008|11:28pm]
Last entry: That's really about it. I'm ready for a vacation and some warm weather, so hopefully both of those things happen soon.

This just in...I'M GOING TO FLORIDA!!!

Awesome!!!!!! Last year in Florida was the best time of the entire year, so I'm REALLY excited about getting to go down! A couple friends are coming down from Michigan and Pennsylvania too, so it's gonna be a blast!!! I'm spending four days down there and I'm going to be performing with my friend Joey at this really cool place in downtown Orlando that we were at last year on tour! I'm so excited!!! :)

Meanwhile, I want to go to Disney!!! I've never been and I think it would be so much fun!!! Hopefully I get to do that while I'm down there! We'll see!

Other than that, it's the same old, same old! Things are fine as usual.

Hope everybody's doing well!!!

Night!
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IT'S COLD!!! [17 Jan 2008|01:37am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

2008.

So far the year's been good to me.

I spent the first weekend in Georgia for a benefit concert for a community center's drama program. Obviously, it was a rad cause, and it was cool because Joey, Chris, and Zoe were doing the show, and Larry was obviously there since he lives down there, so it was a flippin awesome weekend! I got to host the show. We all got to hang out and it was just a really nice time. Shannon came down with me, so it was a really fun trip! The show was sold out, we all had a good time chillin', and most importantly, there were TONS of laughs. "Shalom!" hahahahahaha

Not a lot has happened really. I haven't done much, but things are going pretty well. Next month should be pretty exciting. I got Kelly Clarkson tickets, so I'm definitely excited about seeing her show here in a couple weeks!

Been hanging out with Angah like it's my job. That's been a lot of fun!!! We've essentially been doing nothing, but it's been fun.

That's really about it. I'm ready for a vacation and some warm weather, so hopefully both of those things happen soon. I guess I should probably get some sleep.

Night.

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[17 Dec 2007|02:26am]
[ mood | okay ]

Life has been pretty good lately.

I don't know if I've been stressing out less, or working harder to change the things I'm unhappy about. Whatever the case, things have been pretty okay lately. Not great, but pretty okay. :)

I got a chance to spend some time with Mrs. Jonas and see the guys this past week, so it was really nice to catch up with everybody. This tour was MASSIVE - the venue was sold out at 14,000 people...which is absolutely insane. AWESOME, but insane!!! LOL. It was so crazy to look behind me and see 13,999 people all there to see my friends. From what I heard, their record is now platinum, and I couldn't be any more proud of them.

Aside from all of that, I've been working a lot, so my paycheck on Friday should be pretty awesome!!! It'll be exciting to get things paid off again!!! Work honestly has been going really well, and it's been a lot more fun lately, so that's definitely a good thing too! :)

I guess since I last wrote, I had two more mall performances that went really well, and I also got booked to do a halftime show at my old high school. I found out on Wednesday that I'd be performing on Friday, so it was pretty short notice, but of course, I was excited to do it!!! I had no idea that it was gonna be the biggest game of the year and that there would be 3,000 people there. Needless to say, I walked in to the fieldhouse a few minutes before I had to go on and my jaw dropped! My track skipped at one point during the song, but it couldn't have happened at a better place...it seemed like it was just part of the dance, and luckily, I could play it off, so all in all, it went well and was just a lot of fun!!! The fact that I had five performances in 3 weeks was really awesome, and it's been a lot of fun!!!

As far as Christmas, everyone I'm talking to is saying that they're not in the Christmas spirit, and that it doesn't seem like Christmas, and I couldn't agree more. We just got a bunch of snow, we have decorations up, and presents are under the tree, but it just doesn't seem like Christmas. Maybe it will soon though! I hope at least!!! It's only 8 days away!

New Year's...probably my favorite time of year! Last year, I spent it in Boston celebrating with a bunch of my friends, and honestly, it was the best New Year's I've ever had!!!! This year, I'm thinking about going up to New York City to be in Times Square with my friends. Sure, Times Square is gonna be jam-packed, but I figure what better place to be? NYC on New Year's with my friends...sounds amazing! So hopefully that works out too!!! :)

I guess that's really about it. I'm off to bed!!!

NIGHT!!!

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[07 Dec 2007|06:13pm]
[ mood | happy ]

I got $65 back today for my tire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WIN!!!!!!! :)

That is all.

SCORE!!!!!!

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MORE STRESS [25 Nov 2007|10:28pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

Well, I made it to New York and back, so that was definitely a good thing.

The bad thing was that nothing went according to plan. What was originally supposed to be a 13 hour drive turned into an 18 hour drive because of the holiday traffic and the fact that it was raining. We ended up pulling into Janice's (where we were staying for the first night) at 6 am - yes, 6 in the morning. We pull in and get out of the car when I hear this hissing noise. She lives by the woods, so I just assume it's that, until I notice it's my tire. It's dark, so I can't tell where the hole is, but it's definitely my tire. I fell asleep for about an hour and a half on an air matress on the floor, and long story short, we missed our train to get into the city, which would ultimately mean that we would miss the entire parade (minus the end of the Ronald McDonald float from two blocks down). We went into the city and had lunch at a diner in Times Square, which was fun, and then we headed back to Janice's to fix my tire. We thought we got it fixed, but the next day on our way into the city to see the guys perform on Good Morning America, my tire gave out right before the Lincoln Tunnel, so thankfully some random motorist pulled over and helped change my tire. Needless to say, we missed our call time for GMA and stood out in the freezing cold in the middle of Times Square. It was still cool to be there, but it was just one more thing that went wrong. We all found a place to meet up where the guys could spend a couple minutes seeing friends and family away from fans, so I got to see the guys for a quick minute - long enough to say hi and bye. I spent about 10 minutes playing with Frankie (or letting him beat me up, however you wanna look at it...haha) and went back to pack up to leave for PA to see Joey's parade and spend the night at his house. Needless to say, it took too long and we weren't gonna make it to PA, so we just decided to say "forget it" and head back home. It was AMAZING to see everybody, but NYC did not go as planned. It was definitely cool to see how far the guys had come though compared to this time last year when I was getting ready to go on tour with them.

All that aside, I still haven't paid my phone bill - making it a week overdue. I'm hoping to be able to pay it tomorrow and cover the $175 for my liability insurance, but on top of that, I owe my mom $250, and have my credit card maxed out at $750, which essentially leaves me no money for the birthday presents I need to get, or Christmas...not to mention the daily essentials - gas, food, etc. so I'm not sure how this is gonna all work out. I'm crossing my fingers, though.

I'm so ready to get out of here and just move. I just feel like a fresh start would be SO good. I just need a getaway...a reason to smile. I need to feel like I'm doing something.

I'm exhausted.

I'm sleeping.

Gone.

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The Great Escape [14 Nov 2007|08:23pm]
[ mood | stressed ]

Well Monday night I went down to Indianapolis to do some stuff to get ready for my show coming up this weekend, and long story short, my car ended up dying in the middle of the road, and I ended up stranded overnight in Indianapolis. I spent $200 earlier in the week getting new brakes, brake pads, and routers to prepare for my trip to NYC again this year to celebrate Thanksgiving. With my car breaking down this time, I spent another $270 getting it fixed. I had saved up nearly $400 to make my move in March, and this money is now down the drain, not to mention some money I wanted to have for NYC.

This is just a rough time of year money-wise...Kevin and Shannon both have birthdays this month so there's gifts for those, not to mention Christmas being a month a way, and having $175 to pay out for a 2 million dollar liability insurance claim that I have to have by December 1st.

So what do you do to get money? Work. I've been at work for a solid 10 and a half hours already today and I still have two to go. It's just one of those days that isn't really a bad day, but it's definitely not a good one. I have all day tomorrow off, so that's awesome that I can relax and spend the day doing the things that I need to accomplish, but on the same note, I need to be working to make money.

I'm just bummed out, that's all. I felt like I was doing so good and making great progress, and then BAM! Something like that happens and puts a kink in all my plans. I mean, I'm still planning on going to New York, and stuff, but I have no idea how I'm gonna pay my phone bill or any of this other stuff I'm trying to deal with right now. Things are a mess, thanks to my car.

I haven't really had a whole lot of time to talk to any of my friends lately either, so that's a bummer. I was thinking about it tonight and I haven't talked to my friend Greg for at least a month, and last time we talked was over a text message.

I'm just stressed out, I guess. I felt like maybe writing would help. And it just made me realize how much of a mess this is now that I haev it all laid out in front of me.

Things will work out, I just don't know much more of this I can take...

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape


CHRIS

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